Nunzio: The Anatomy of the Player
Nunzio is an electrician, or more precisely, a master electrician, as he will make sure you know. He arrives at the job site in a shiny, late model pick up truck. His truck is white, and always immaculate. When Nunzio arrives on the site, he takes the time to finish his cell phone call, in a leisurely fashion, and then emerges from the truck, in a relaxed leisurely fashion. Nunzio is wearing designer jeans, designer boots, and a fitted sports jacket. From what I have described so far, you might think that Nunzio is an ass. This is, no doubt a fair description of Nunzio, however there is something about Nunzio, which is infectious. One cannot help liking Nunzio.
After the sales meeting, during which he stresses personal service to his clients, as his winning formula, you are not likely to hear from him until it is time for a progress payment. Despite being a master-electrician, Nunzio devotes his time to selling and collecting exclusively.
I have known Nunzio for several years. One of his favorite lines is: Johnny, I have got your back. Over the years, one thing I have come to count on is that anytime I really do need Nunzio, he will give me a compelling reason why he cannot do what I am asking of him. At least, not right then. Despite this, in his own mind, Nunzio is fully convinced that he has had my back for a long time, for which he is owed a debt of gratitude. Gratitude is a bit of a sore spot for Nunzio. He spends a lot of time dwelling on how much he does for others and how little he receives in return. The construction industry is cyclical and contractors are going out of business all the time. Many truly worthy electricians close up shop. Nunzio not only endures; he thrives. Nunzio is a player!
Players come in all shapes and sizes. They can be the Wall Street tycoon, but they can just as easily be the local real estate agent, school principal, or, as in the case of Nunzio, a contractor. The degree of finesse with which they ply their trade may vary, but at heart they are all essentially the same. So then, what are these distinguishing features, which make the players so different from the rest of us?
Firstly, players are born, not made. The player is compulsive; they cannot but play. Their manipulations, their deceitfulness, their twisting and bending the truth to always reflect well on them and further their aims is more of a reflex than a conscious choice. Being a player is not a matter of choice, but destiny.
The player lies and manipulates with such facility that, in a very real sense, they cannot truly distinguish between fact and fiction. Their fabrications are as real for them as the veritable facts are for the rest of us. There is none among us who does not in some way bend the truth to suit. Nonetheless, even though our variations of a particular event may vary, they will not diverge completely.
For a player, the facts are the bare canvas upon which they paint masterpieces, which have only the vaguest relation to what actually took place. In a sense, the player is as mad as a hatter, but their particular brand of psychosis is so socially adaptive that if we were to brand them as insane, we would be indicting the entire society we live in.
One quality common to all players worth highlighting is an absolute absence of empathy. This cannot be stressed strongly enough. To say that players lack empathy is actually a gross understatement. The player is wholly indifferent to the suffering of anyone but themselves. Nunzio is completely blind to the fact that he never follows through on his extravagant commitments, yet he is acutely aware of even the pettiest slight to his reputation. To the extent that another strokes their vanity, or is useful in some way, they are tolerated. If these conditions are, for whatever reason, no longer met, the other simply ceases to exist.
Another quality that players share is an uncanny ability to stay on message. Be it O.J. Simpson protesting his innocence, or Dick Cheney justifying the Bush doctrine, they live by the famous quote from Talleyrand: he who excuses himself, accuses himsel. No matter what information is provided to refute their claims, they stick to their guns to the bitter end. As much as this sounds pathological, it actually works very much in their favor. The sheer relentlessness, with which they maintain their position, eventually makes us unsure of our own.
Players have a healthy disdain for anything approximating work. Be it creative, intellectual or menial, it is simply below them. You will always find them well away from the din of battle. They occupy themselves with selling, promoting, and marketing on the one side and with all things related to money, on the other. Anything between the two, the actual creation of the product, for instance, is of no interest to them. Being free from the pressures most of us experience in trying to meet deadlines and just keeping on keeping on, players are the picture of cool, unwavering composure; never in a rush, never flustered, and never busy.
Players are naturally drawn to wealth and power. It makes sense that those jobs, social settings and tribes with the highest status will attract the greatest concentration of players.
So the next time you watch a sales pitch on television, a political address, or a sermon from a charismatic preacher, take amount and ask yourself : Is this a player? Am I being played?
John Berling Hardy is author of the e-book “Have We Been
Played?- The Hidden Game Revealed.” The insights contained in
this series give you the Edge. To find out more about the carefully
guarded secret shared by all those who enjoy power and prestige visit
Have We Been Played.com.
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